Current Symptoms

I feel so lousy today. I have been dreaming a lot deeper in the mornings and waking up from such a deep sleep feels very weird. My head feels swollen or something. My ears and ringing, my tongue is twitching, and this full body pain that I'm experiencing seems different. Definitely worse. My actual bones feel like they hurt from head to toe, and I have such a bad headache. I feel hunger but don't want to eat ANYTHING because Paleo foods do not satisfy my hunger at all. My stomach muscles feel pulled from injections and my legs hurt really bad. I went to see my chiropractor and she told me I do not need an adjustment and she actually did not feel excess swelling. So I don't know what I'm feeling. I'm really irritable and am having sensory overload. Maybe I'm having Lyme rage? My doc has said nothing about detoxing at home. Like lemon water or epsom baths. I need to ask him. I have not been taking my iron supplements but I'm going to start again to see if they help. I have such an unusual headache in my whole forehead. I go back up to the clinic in 4 days. They don't seem to say a lot about herxing or feeling worse. My neuropathy in my left leg has changed to worse RLS and it now feels like water is dripping down my leg sometimes, which I had read about but not experienced. It feels like electricity sometimes, too. I feel so nauseated and the back of my head at the base of my skull hurts. I keep thinking the 3hr drive is taxing on my body, which it probably is, but this really is probably a herx. I've already been told that my liver and gallbladder don't do a very good job. I hate how weak and shaky and dizzy I am in the mornings. It is SCARY at times. My skin color does NOT look good, either. I know I need to be patient and expect that it gets worse before it gets better, but I think the clinic was expecting me to feel better sooner? I don't know. I am thankful I have such an amazing husband to take care of me and an amazing mom to take care of my little boy. I can't even talk about or think about how badly it pains my heart that I have to leave him all the time or send him to someone else to be taken care of. I NEVER wanted to be that mom. That in itself is almost worse than the chronic illness and pain and misery. I am going to go take an epsom salt bath now and hope it helps, which nothing really has ever helped me ever. I have faith that will start changing, though.

My brain is still having a hard time comprehending and accepting that I have Lyme Disease. I find myself frantically trying to figure out why I feel the way I do because that's all I did all day every day for a year and a half. I would just google symptoms endlessly. I FEEL THE WAY I DO BECAUSE I AM FILLED WITH BACTERIAL PARASITES. They do whatever they want, however they want, whenever they want, as much as they want to my entire body, head to toe. And they are currently being fought, which makes me feel worse and strange and tortured. I just need to be calm and trust the treatment and not worry when I have random flare ups.